Shouldn’t there be a moratorium?

If I only see you once or twice a year, at best, I think it would be a great idea to not be invited to your wedding, baby shower, whateverthefuck. I think I can say that I’ve reached a point in my life that I should be past weddings and baby showers unless I get hoodwinked into some workplace celebration of either.

Since I’m going to be 41 years old this year, it’s safe to say that my friends and close family members are either married or have spawned by now. I don’t need to celebrate with people in their 20s or early 30s because, seriously, I really doubt I have one thing in common with you other than some distant familial bond or not even that. So, if I have little in common with you, why on this earth would I want to spend an afternoon or an evening standing around making small talk about how beautiful the bride is or how cute the baby will be with your friends? Whom I’ve never met? I can tell you that I care NOT ONE WIT about any of it.

Get back to me in 30 years when I have absolutely nothing to do and would love to shove tiny bits of cake in my mouth because sitting at home watching Dr. Phil has lost it’s spark.

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2 Responses to Shouldn’t there be a moratorium?

  1. Liz says:

    I agree. The only weddings/showers I plan on hosting or attending will be for the kids of my good friends and my own kids. Hopefully I have plenty of time for that. I can’t deal with this ‘tween my generation and my kids’ generation. I can’t relate.

    A couple years ago we went to wedding of a former co-worker of Jim’s. She was in her mid-20′s, as were most of the guests. The other guests were the friends of the parents. I never felt like a third wheel as much as then.

  2. Frog says:

    Yep, the wedding we went to in January was for my cousin and he’s in his early 20s. I knew family members but that’s it. I haven’t seen my cousin in over a year…that sense of familial obligation has been wrung out of me. So, all those other young 20-something cousins that I have nothing in common with because frankly they aren’t in my peer group because we’re more than 15 years apart in age can just get a gift in the mail because I’m not interested in going to any more weddings for people I barely know.

    The thing that set me off is that the better-half’s cousin is having a baby (we refer to the baby as the second coming because you’d think no one else has ever had a baby–at least not one as awesome as this one). If you tally up all the time I’ve actually spent talking to her in the 17 or so years that the better-half and I have known each other you still wouldn’t come up with more than 4 hours of talking time. Why would I drive 2 hours to go to that baby shower?

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